When it becomes more about the person, and less about the community, then it is no longer about the community at all.
I guess it was watching someone scream MINE! all the while claiming it’s for the good of the community that made me sit back and wonder exactly what the motivation was here. I guess after watching the mud slinging, the name calling, the ridiculing and the arrogance that I decided that this was definitely not more, more, more love. Nope, this was definitely more, more, more drama.
And from a grown up, over the age of sixty, no less.
Anyone with any sense can plainly see that if there is a splintering of community, this person is causing it.
But why? Why all of the screaming and the libelous accusations of thievery?
Is this really all about some folks gathering to have a good time? A gathering everyone was invited to, I might add.
Was it because they had a great time?
Or that they plan to do it again?
How can any of those things be enough to set someone off on an embarrassing and intimately revealing rampage?
When someone has a good time doing something and promotes the community by sharing their good story, only sour grapes and jealousy will find fault with it. After all, when they had a good time with you, they shared their story and there wasn’t a screaming meltdown from anyone about it then.
On one side I see the people that had a great time. They are sharing their fun experiences and talking about having more of them together soon. There are pictures of friends together. They are laughing, standing shoulder to shoulder. There is camaraderie and happiness and not a single drop of negativity in the mix.
This is community at it’s best.
On the other side, I see one person screaming, ridiculing and belittling everything the word community stands for, simply because they refused to do it his way. I see nasty captioned pictures and cursing. Angry responses to simple curiosity. And there are the few stick pokers that like to jump on the bandwagon with nothing more to add except the occasional squirt of fuel to the angry and out of control fire.
That’s not community.
So let’s take this down a notch or two so you can see just how silly this has looked to the rest of the world.
If I want to have a My Little Pony party and invite everyone I know, including you, then I have the right to do that. Just because you might have thrown a My Little Pony party last year, doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to have one of my own this year. In fact, I can even have my party on the same day you have your party. It doesn’t mean mine is better than yours, or that yours is better than mine. I’ve never heard anyone complain about there being too many parties! It also doesn’t mean you aren’t invited to mine. It doesn’t even mean you can’t come to mine if you really want to come. I’d love to have you there!
I might like to go to your party too…but here’s the thing. I’m not going to attend your party just to listen to you malign and disparage my friends, and I’m not going to sit there and agree with your dark and moody outlook because all of the red got licked off your candy and you’re mad about it.
If I am going to go to a party, it’s going to be fun and people are going to be happy to be there of their own free will. Who would want people at their party out of a sense of obligation or fear? That’s no fun!
Even if you don’t come to my party, it’s still not nice to post pictures of my party with captions that read; Her Little Jackass Party. I think you can guess who everyone will see as the real jackass here, can’t you? Um, yeah…it’s you.
If lots of people attended my party and you can see they had a really nice time, why would you begrudge them of this? Let them be happy about it. You had a party too. Didn’t you have fun at your party? Or did you come home wearing the donkey’s tail?
See? It doesn’t even have to be me that’s having the other party. Next year there might be an entirely new group that decides to have a My Little Pony party, in addition to my party and yours. What’s going to happen then? More of the same loud screaming, foot stamping temper tantrum?
If more and more people decide to do their own thing are you just going to take your toys and go home?
Or will you realize that being loyal to the one person that is set on tearing the entire community apart simply because someone wouldn’t do it his way is a waste of your time?
When will you stop to notice that what is happening there isn’t about the community at all?
History? Who started the first event ever? Who cares?! It’s still fun and it’s still all about the same idea! Saying you own the history is like claiming you own the wind, or the moon or the stars? Am I not allowed to look at the stars just because another person named them?
In all of this, the only thing I see that has splintered is the one that’s screaming the loudest because the community is about everyone and not all of them will agree with each other all the time, but one thing stands the test of time…
They all love My Little Pony. And isn’t that what it’s really all about anyway?
Trust me, the minute people start calling others bad names and trying to publicly humiliate someone just because they have a different opinion, they are showing you exactly who they really are. They are bullies. And if they will treat someone they considered a friend that way, just think of how they’ll treat you the minute you ever disagree with their dogma. The bully’s tirades and tantrums serve only one purpose and that is to make you fear being left out of the group and to distract you from ever seeing the real truth behind what’s happening.
What’s happening is a whole shitload of toxic behavior. Who has time for that noise? I would rather spend my time with happy people that are having a happy time. Wouldn’t you? I’d have to suggest that in the future perhaps more bridge building and less bridge burning might get all of us to a happier place.
Think for yourself. Don’t be a lemming. It could cost you a friend one day.
You might be wondering why I have chosen to write parts of this story on the reading level of a First Grader using My Little Pony and I’ll tell you why. It’s written this way for grown ups, who act like children, so they can understand that sometimes change is a very good thing.
I recently saw a saying that made total sense to me…
“The most dangerous phrase in language is; we’ve always done it this way.”
~Rear Admiral Grace Hopper