This is a topic I have written about in one form, or another, many times before. Making an exit when times call for it is just the right thing to do. Many folks never notice, or pay attention to, their cues. I used to be one of those people that ignored the gentle thumbs pointing towards the Out Door until that giant hook had to be employed to yank me off the stage. I would stay until the bitter end and it never got any better.
These days I pay attention and I make my Exit before exiting becomes impossible to do.
I’ve heard the condemnations yelled after me too. “Oh you’re running away!” or “Stand up and face life!” or “Don’t be a coward!” Those are taunts made by people that really have no idea what is going on in your life, but more importantly, they don’t care enough about you to see you avoid being hurt further. And if they do know the details and they still insist you stay and duke it out, those are people you need to make an exit from as well. I used to listen to them, but I don’t anymore. I have had enough time being their source of voyeuristic entertainment. If they want the horror show to continue, they are most welcome to take over my part and be the star.
There is nothing cowardly about walking away from drama, pain or abuse. Never allow anyone to tell you to stay in a situation when you are being subjected to toxic behavior and emotional abuse.
Today I want you to think about your own toxic situations. Ask yourself those hard questions about what those scenarios are adding to your life.
Do they even make you feel good about yourself?
Do they add anything of substance to your days here?
What do you get out of staying in those relationships?
Take money and support off the table because there is no amount of money that will ever pay for your time. Time is priceless.
Take pride off the table because staying in a toxic relationship out of pride or worry about what other people will say or think is just silly.
Take love off of the table too because someone that truly loves you will never abuse you.
Making an exit is never an easy thing to do, but in order to live a full, healthy life there are times when exiting is necessary. When those nagging clues start mounting up, letting you know it’s time to reevaluate a situation you’re in, don’t ignore them.
Welcome that intuition that is set in place to protect your heart and soul and make an exit when it’s time to go.
Never allow anyone to frighten you by telling you that walking away from their friendship will mean you’ll be all alone. That’s just not true and it’s a tactic used by bullies with fear in their hearts, not love. Anyone that threatens you when you say you’re leaving is not someone you want to be around.
The fact is that once you start clearing your life of toxic people it opens the door for healthy and loving friendships to form in the void left by the toxic friend. I know this to be true because that’s what has happened in my own life. Once I left those time consuming, drama ridden, fearful people behind and started being good to myself and making personal boundaries, my life filled with goodness. I was surprised by how many great friends I already had, but hadn’t made the time to notice because I had been so busy managing the few bad ones to see them.
When you begin to live life for you, instead of living it for the sake of everyone else, all the rest will fall into place.
Sometimes making an exit is simply running towards what life really means. Life isn’t about drama. Life isn’t about hatred, self loathing, depression or abuse. Life is about living the best life you can and if getting there means making an exit, then let the door hit you squarely in the ass when you leave. Let that smack on your bottom be the one that propels you towards happiness.
And don’t forget to leave them with a parting gift. Pop them a big bird right as the door closes. 🙂