feeling entitled

009

I was listening to another of my favorite podcasts the other day and the word “entitled” was discussed. The podcaster said that this is a word that carries with it a lot of ill feelings in our world today. I think a sense of entitlement can be arrogant, self centered and mostly undeserved of the person that has the sense of entitlement. It brings to mind a petulant and spoiled child stomping their feet and yelling to be heard.

At any rate, she was saying that sometimes we need to feel entitled.

I think there is a fine line there.   

A couple of years ago someone I was fond of borrowed almost $1000 from me to have her tooth repaired. She said, “I’ll pay you back before you leave to go home.” and I haven’t seen a penny of that money since.

Recently I read that she was standing at the checkout counter in a supermarket and had taken more items than she could afford. She was embarrassed and shuffling around trying to decide what to put back, when she spied someone she knew standing in line a few patrons back. She wrote that this was someone she called “a friend”. It would seem the friend wasn’t interested in giving her the money to cover her grocery bill though. She was incensed and lamented that times were hard for everyone and this person really should have stepped up and assisted her by paying.

I read this and wanted to shout at her.

When did she become so entitled to everyone else’s money?

I think we are all entitled to taking care of ourselves. We are allowed to sleep enough hours in a night and to put ourselves first so we remain healthy in our minds and in our bodies. I believe this.

I do not believe we are to put those people around us at our mercy and to use them for whatever we can get, just so our selfish and extravagant needs are met.

I also believe that the Universe provides for those that don’t take advantage of others, which is proven by the grocery checkout story. That woman has always been selfish and greedy. She has taken money from more folks than just me. Karma is making the rounds there.

So what does entitlement feel like?

The definition is pretty straightforward. You feel you have a right to something. You feel that you deserve it. Usually this is about special privileges and luxuries. You can also feel entitled to have certain feelings or to have feelings returned to you by someone else.

Feeling entitled isn’t about softness or demure posture. Feeling this way is a demand. You demand that this is made so. I see nothing wrong with standing your ground on some matters, but I think under any circumstances at all, whatever you feel entitled to should be something you have earned.

The next time you find yourself in a position of feeling like you’re owed something, ask yourself if this is something you feel you’ve earned, or if you simply want it because you feel entitled to it.

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About Madeline Scribes

A writer with a sense of humor. If anyone can laugh at life, it's me.
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12 Responses to feeling entitled

  1. Tejaswi says:

    I have the feeling that most of your readers would feel this is a rant. But it is quite true and I agree with you and I have been saying the same things for a long time. The entire world seems to be afflicted by this disease. For example, my countrymen living in the UK or the US feel that they are entitled to more privileges and special treatment than the rest. A weird thing happened a couple of years ago in the UK. A cow that was reared by a temple priest was found to have the Mad Cow disease. The civic authorities wanted to put it down as a health hazard. The entire Hindu community there protested, went all the way to their Supreme Court and finally when they had a stay order on the termination, the cow died of the illness. The civic authorities wanted to incinerate the carcass and then the nonsense began again about holy rites and all that. It was a shameful thing. What entitled these people?
    Or for that matter when there is a law in your adopted country that frowns upon wearing a hijab (for muslims) or bearing a kirpan sword (for Sikhs) or any other law that seems to involve people’s personal beliefs, what entitles these people to say that they have rights too that surpass the common law over there? An American woman going to Saudi cannot be permitted to flaunt her mini-skirts or walk around in a bikini But the other way round, you are entitled? All this might sound like a bigoted mind, but then I am as brown as the people who crib about all this. I am also a resident of a third-world country. If I had to live in another country, my allegiance would be to that constitution and to adhere to the laws prevalent there. However, that is not the reality. We have all become over-sensitive, we have all this sense of “entitlement” and this is what I cannot understand.
    It is, these days, politically incorrect to say all this aloud. But then that is exactly the problem. When you don’t say it aloud, it festers and turns into a racial bias or a prejudice. If someone is slightly well-off there is some kind of resentment from those who claim to have lesser privileges. You ought to feel guilty for possessing what others don’t, is what is taught to us. Being charitable is a deeply personal thing. Doing favours to people against your best instincts is what has turned out to be charity now. I am incensed when people who have borrowed people from others tell me, “it is not like they will miss it. It is not such a big deal”. Well, and since they have more than you, you are entitled to a share of their wealth?? I cannot understand it…

    Oh well, if your post wasn’t a rant, then this comment certainly turned out to be one hahaha.. sorry about this long comment. I could really write volumes about this, but then it would just show the world how much of a bigot I am 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh Tejaswi!! Bravo! Bravo! Your comment is so much more eloquent than my entire post! I applaud you immensely!! I can not say it, write it or express it better than you just have here. I hope everyone skips over my meanderings and comes straight here to read this truth you’ve written for me. I am honored!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Tejaswi says:

        Thank you, but I am going to be pilloried for saying that 😀 hahaha.. even my wife, who is so fond of calling me a bigot, will have a field day here.. haha..

        Liked by 1 person

      • I don’t think you are a bigot at all! I’ve seen scads of tolerance from you on past posts and besides…if you’re a bigot about this subject, then I’m in good company because it means I’m one too.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Tejaswi says:

        Thanks… it is just that these views, such views, are unpopular. Even if people feel the same things as we do, they would simply protest that this is racism or bigotry or selfishness or elitism. It is not. But then we live in hyper-“politically correct” times. “Gasp!! He said it, she said it!!” etc.

        (I await my hyper-patriotic, hyper-religious countrymen and their vitriol at my comment)

        Liked by 1 person

      • I stopped being politically correct before it was the cool thing to do. I tend to say what everyone else is thinking, and are too afraid to say. The great thing about that is it frees them to say it too.

        I think the day we stopped having conversations and discussions, was the day we stopped being a civilization.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. whine-wine-whatever says:

    This is a powerful post (and I include the comments back and forth, as well) that really pinpoints the gradual disregard our society has for integrity, and the depths people will go to in order to undeservedly take advantage of the goodness of kindhearted people.

    For instance, the current political climate is clearly a reflection of the scarcity of integrity, respect and personal character. All it takes is for a handful of vocal people to agree with a completely skewed perspective and the cockroaches come out of the woodwork to commiserate. Once they see that there are few, if any, consequences to being a racist or misogynist or xenophobic idiot, they band together, flaunt their stupidity and then we’ve got a real problem. It’s an example of the lowest common denominator finding comfort in people who are as stupid as they are. It can become a mob mentality very quickly, as these people find courage in numbers. But I digress…

    As for the entitled bitch who STOLE your money because maybe you’re more “well-off” than she is, therefore you can “afford” it if she decides not to pay you back? I strongly suspect Karma is already raining down on her and her greedy, self-serving ass.

    Like

    • Truth!! Another comment worthy of mass sharing. I totally agree with you about how our society is breeding this form of ill contempt. I would never assume someone was going to pay for something as expensive as my tooth, much less my lunch. I don’t get how these people sleep at night.

      Like

  3. charlypriest says:

    I always try to poke holes in an argument ,just for the fun of it really to keep my mind a bit sharp, but I got to say that you nailed it. I completely agree with you, as a matter of fact what you said is what I discuss with family and friends. Great thought process.

    Like

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