Let them eat Cake!

eiffel tower

Let them eat cake!

This was the alleged response Marie Antoinette gave when told the French peasants were revolting because they had no bread to eat and were starving to death. In other words, let them do whatever they like, as long as it doesn’t interfere with what I’m doing. This same disregard for another person’s predicament or feelings brings to mind a conversation I had with a woman that had positioned herself between a man she desired and his longtime mate.

Me: How did you let him know you were interested in something more than a friendship with him?

Her: We were at a convention and a guy was hitting on me at the bar one night. I asked him if he would pretend to be my boyfriend, and he did.

Me: And that’s it?

Her: Yeah. It put the idea in his head and it let him know I was interested. I kind of flirted with him a little too.

Me: He lives with his girlfriend and I happen to know he’s in love with her and has been for many years. Did it bother you that he was in a long term relationship?   

Her: Not really. In the beginning I just pretended it was for sex, but later I fell in love with him and hated watching him go home to her at night after he had been with me.

Me: Did you ever think about how she might feel knowing he was coming home at night with your funk on his dick?

Her: You don’t have to put it like that! No, I never thought about her except to wish she’d go away so he and I could be together full time.

For tiny split seconds I could actually see the sociopath peeking out of this girl. I could hear the resounding, “Let them eat cake!” How else would I perceive what she was doing when I knew it was wrong and people were being hurt by her actions? I certainly wasn’t going to sugarcoat my reaction to her. She didn’t give a fig about this other woman, and in fact, I don’t believe she gave much thought to the man she was claiming to be in love with either. This was all about her and what she wanted.

The behavior that made Marie Antoinette think it’s okay to shut the door on her countrymen when they starving to death simply because they were inconvenient, is the same behavior that made this woman think she was justified in fucking a man that was in a committed relationship and then feeling betrayed when he went home to his girlfriend at night.

It’s that same disconnect.

It’s lack of empathy for another human being. 

You can’t learn how to have empathy. You either have it, or you don’t. If a person doesn’t have empathy then it’s a good bet they are a sociopath, or about as close to one as a person can get.

A great rule to make with yourself is that once you realize the person you’re spending time with lacks empathy for others is bid them adieu, even if they make you feel like a million bucks.  Trust me, you’ll only be treated well until they tire of you. They’ll move on to their next victim and you, my friend, will eat cake.

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About Madeline Scribes

A writer with a sense of humor. If anyone can laugh at life, it's me.
This entry was posted in All kinds of Advice and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Let them eat Cake!

  1. Tejaswi says:

    You know, the more I read your blog, the more I like you and your thoughts. In fact, it is a little strange that a while ago I was reading about something of this sort on another blog and I was rendered speechless. Think of it as the woman in this story and how she would have blogged it, the other perspective – except in this case it is a happily married woman. Wanting a divorce for Christmas is not such a scandal, but I kept wondering why this woman who claimed to be in love with her man and always gushed about it, had no complaints about it other than that it became “routine”, would want a divorce. It is almost like there is no more excitement in the relationship, I am Bored, is essentially what they seem to say. Then they look for approval online, which they get from their “loyal readers” by the shovelful, and then take that as a cue to be “happy finally”. I want to pursue my dreams, I want to be free, I don’t want to be tied down, I don’t find anything special in this marriage and so on and so forth. Well, the truth is, weaned on Hollywood movies, with their happily-ever-afters, their silly sodden romances and creating magic out of ordinary characters and lives, people seem to think that is what is missing in their own lives. In the movies, we laud the romance between a bum and a waitress at a diner, look at it larger than life, we remember the memorable moments. Alas, the real world is not like that. We are destined to die anonymous deaths and we are hardly noticed if we even carry on outrageously. That is what is missing, apparently. That not being noticed is the thing that irks people.
    I am a little saddened this morning (AM here..) and I am a little confused too. Yes, it is a selfish, self-centered world and the rest of the world seems to encourage that. Be yourself, they say. DO what you want, your happiness is the most important thing. Madeline, I think this is where we lost our world. Each man (and woman) for him/herself. There I go, being an old fogey. But, yes, I am old fashioned and probably unpopular. No empathy at all in the world and then the faux-empathy online and social media pours forth like thick syrup. About as sugary and as insignificant. Clings on to you, for sure, but utterly worthless.

    Like

    • Very true. Some folks live their whole lives just wanting to be noticed. Now they have a platform to be noticed on called Facebook. The only problem is that desperately wanting to be noticed can attract the wrong kind of admirers. I learned that the hard way and after much heartache and growth I know now that the only person that really needs to acknowledge and validate me is myself. As long as I’m happy with who I am, I should be just fine.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Tejaswi says:

        Actually, I have been the very opposite. I hate to be noticed. In the old days, when I was in college perhaps, or even after that, it was difficult to hide. I would be noticed no matter what. Then about a decade ago I turned into a recluse. My wife still calls me the reluctant introvert, but that is only partly true. I like human company only if they make sense, only if they aren’t biased or politically on the wrong side, or if they are intelligent enough to talk their version even if it annoys me and are open to listening to my side as well. Well, not many people like that these days, so my new phone number has a grand total of five contacts in it. The other phone, I’d rather not use it at all, and at times I look at a name when a call comes through and try darned hard to figure out who it is. It might get a little lonely like that, but the few moments with good friends is worth the discomfort. I am garrulous, extroverted, but I have begun to hate the world as it is now. Old curmudgeon!! Hahahaha.
        Be who you are, Madeline, I respect that.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. whine-wine-whatever says:

    Oh, crikey. Another effing victim…of her own actions. Though, SO not her fault, right? *facepalm*

    ||| I asked him if he would pretend to be my boyfriend |||
    ||| In the beginning I just pretended it was for sex |||

    There’s a whole lot of pretending going on, girl. Get.A.Clue. And acquaint yourself with Reality.

    Sheesh.

    Liked by 1 person

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