Sashes, are they hazardous?

sash

A sash is a band or ribbon worn about the waist as part of one’s clothing. Usually tied in a cute bow in the back.

I love wearing a sash!

I have this cute blouse that has a long sash on the back and I wore it to my doctor’s office today. I had to pee when I arrived so I waited in line for the bathroom after I checked in with the nurse. When it was my turn to go I locked the door behind me and “emptied my bladder”. I washed my hands and reached for my coat and noticed that I had dripped some water on it. I brushed it off and proceeded back out to the waiting area and sat down.  

As I plopped on the waiting room sofa I felt a wet spot underneath where I was sitting so I touched the sofa to determine how big the spot was and then moved over and away from it, only to find another wet spot. I couldn’t figure out where the water was coming from. Then the nurse called my name because it was my turn to be seen by the doctor. I stood up and then kind of felt the *wet spot* following me so I reached my hand behind me to touch my backside only to realize the wet spot was me!

The Horror!

Dangling behind me in it’s constant state of cuteness is my sash, soaking wet. The ends of it had fallen into the toilet and I had probably peed on it!

I somewhat nonchalantly sauntered towards the exam room holding onto my wet sash so it wouldn’t drip, drip, drip all the way down the hall. Once inside I stood stoic as the nurse gave me the instructions “take off everything but your bra and put on this gown”. All I could think was *gee, I can’t wait to do just that*. As soon as she left I ripped off my shirt, dabbed at it with one of the disinfectant wipes from the counter top  and then tore into the Kleenex box trying to hurriedly make some progress drying the poor thing before my doctor entered the exam room.

Trailing behind me as I left the office that day was my sash, all limp and now not-so-cute.

I remember as a little girl having many dresses with sashes. I wondered that day how I had lived all those years wearing a sash and don’t remember ever having peed on one. And then it dawned on me. I wasn’t this tall then. Being shorter my feet probably didn’t touch the floor once I sat down and the sash would have been much shorter too. So it begs to ask; should adults be wearing a sash? Is the longer sash cute, or just a urine-soaked, fashion risk?

Note: sashes are cute, fun and very absorbent. Will I still wear them? You bet! Like I said, I love wearing a sash!

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About Madeline Scribes

A writer with a sense of humor. If anyone can laugh at life, it's me.
This entry was posted in Memories good and bad and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Sashes, are they hazardous?

  1. It could sense it was not an easy time for you; and you narrate it with such ease. Courageous of you isn’t it? Well done! My advice: just be more careful next time.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Christa chn says:

    Am so sorry, but today it’s the day of hysterical laughter, am laughing so much that my jaws are aching..sheesh, you all bloggers are making me go all laughing like crazy. Great post.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. andy1076 says:

    I can imagine the look on your face through it lol 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  4. TalkaholicMe says:

    I really enjoyed reading it.. you wrote it nicely.. Sashes are cute indeed, all you need to do is to be careful next time..

    Liked by 1 person

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