is that a Worm in my apple? Or am I becoming a rotten person?

now that I have your attention…

It has been the year of exits for me and some of my *cough*friendly*cough* connections. Being the bitchy one that calls a person out for behaving like a jerk and then walking away from them because I just don’t want to deal with anymore of their drama, is not an activity I enjoy. I don’t know of anyone that enjoys that. It’s exhausting and debilitating.

Even when I have a nice, quiet egress from someone that turns my stomach sour with their histrionics and machinations, I still end up grieving and saddened that it had to happen. It is also frustrating to know that I made another bad choice in picking the person I was going to spend my time with.

Why does this keep happening?!

Why it happens is irrelevant. Life happens and people will come and go no matter how picky we try to be. You are just never going to know someone, until you get to know them. It’s kind of like cutting open a watermelon, or biting into a peach. Some days they’re deliciously ripe and wonderfully sweet, and other days you get a rotten sourpuss. But you keep eating fruit, right? You keep trying until you find the perfect one, or one that’s close enough, one that’s good for you, that you can enjoy.

I told one of my friends recently that I was starting to worry that perhaps I have stopped liking people. Can you imagine that? What can you do when you lose your enthusiasm for human beings? What if I’m supposed to live out the rest of my life as this mean, bitchy old woman that tells everyone to fuck off? She laughed and said that I wasn’t a mean, old woman and that I was finally figuring out where my personal boundaries are. She said if I have to tell someone to fuck off, I probably won’t miss them.

I guess what that really means is you eventually realize that you can look forward to a lot more happiness and a lot less drama once you finally start to know who YOU are.

Until next time, this is Madeline Laughs and I’d like to dedicate this post to my friend Trish, who knows who she is and can spot a good friend from thousands of miles away, on a sandbar in the Atlantic Ocean.

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About Madeline Scribes

A writer with a sense of humor. If anyone can laugh at life, it's me.
This entry was posted in All kinds of Advice and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to is that a Worm in my apple? Or am I becoming a rotten person?

  1. anne leueen says:

    Yup! When I was younger, about a thousand years ago, I thought I might end up a miserable old prune propping up a bar somewhere because I went through the same thought process as you. But…I have not. And your friend is right. Set those boundaries. They will serve you well.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, knowing YOURSELF is the key to it all. And what an epiphany I had when you taught me about the importance of setting boundaries! Having just done that with an acquaintance, I have to admit it’s so freeing to finally cut someone loose who’s been nothing but a narcissist and drama creator. As a people-pleaser, I’d always tried to mold myself to get along with everyone and overlook whatever self-absorbed or sociopathic behaviors were being displayed. Through self-awareness and self-exploration, I’ve gradually learned to recognize triggers and hot buttons, and to set personal boundaries for what I would and wouldn’t tolerate from my “friends” and our interactions. I feel free! Some people cross our paths and aren’t meant to stay; they’re there to provide valuable lessons, both good and bad.

    Thank you for always sharing your insights so generously! Keep sampling the fruit… ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Gypsycowgirl says:

    As you once quoted “Anne Lamott”
    in FB; “Tell your story…If people wanted you to write warmly, they should have behaved better.” I love that and have shared it with many friends !

    Liked by 1 person

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